The Witham Staple considers life in general
This page includes items that address life in general or in a light hearted way.
Minor
Irritations / Simple Pleasures
Common Complaints / Simple Pleasures
"A sharp tongue is the only edged tool that grows keener with constant use."
Washington Irving [WS April 2005]
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junk mail and unsolicited ‘offers’
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shops where staff seem far too busy tidying up to serve you
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‘open here’ tabs too small to hold and too tough to budge
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yet another TV advert for... yes, you guessed it! — a car
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the ‘friend’ who tells you everything.., and listens to nothing
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football buffs who could have done a better job than the players
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the driver who pretends you’re not there rather than let you into the
traffic queue
And Simple
Pleasures…
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the scent of a field of beans in flower
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the envelope whose handwriting you recognise and welcome
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that cup of tea in garden shade on a hot summer’s afternoon
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the parent who stops and listens to what a toddler has to say
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the simplest meal shared with people who are good company
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simply... people who are good company!
Most
of us probably find the occasional moan quite sa1isfying! But the canny thing is
to find more reasons for being pleased than ones to complain about — otherwise
you find yourself belonging to the first list rather than the second! Life is
full of simple pleasures. What are your favourites? [WS
July 2004]
Minor
Irritations...
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the motorist who doesn’t let you in when the traffic is in a queue
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the ‘friend’ who tells you everything.., and listens to nothing
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shops with a ‘Pay Here’ notice that you somehow just can’t find
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‘safety’ jars and bottles that need a wrestler’s grip to open them
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the waiter/waitress who asks if ‘everything was all right for you’
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prices that end in 99p
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football penalty shoot-outs...
And
Simple Pleasures…
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the irresistible smell of newly baked bread
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the squeal of swifts flying across the summer skies
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the happy wagging of a dog’s tail who knows he’s pleased you
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that first cup of good English tea when you’re back from abroad
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gardens heavy with the evening scent of orange blossom
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the utter delight of a toddler who discovers they can run
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hanging out the washing on a sunny morning
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eyes that don’t need words to say what they feel...
Most
of us probably find the occasional moan quite satisfying! But the canny thing is
to find two reasons for being pleased for every one you complain about. Life is
full of simple pleasures. What are your favourites?
[WS
Jun 2003]
• the idiot
motorist who sits on your tail till he can burn past
•
the ‘friend’ who tells you
“you look well”, in a surprised tone
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shop assistants who finish their conversation while you wait to be served
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football penalty shoot-outs...
And Simple Pleasures
•
the squeal of swifts flying
across the summer skies
•
gardens heavy with the evening scent of orange blossom
•
the utter delight of a toddler who discovers they can run
•
Hanging out the washing on a sunny morning...
Life
is full of simple pleasures. What are your favourites?
[WS
Jul 2002]
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Banking
does not get easier!
The
HSBC mobile bank paid its final visit to Bassingham on Tuesday 23rd September.
The service is unfortunately to be discontinued. A reminder that account holders
with Alliance & Leicester, Barclays or Lloyds TSB can use local post
offices. [WS
Oct 2003]
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Every Body Has Its Bones
Any
Organisation has its different groups of bones. First there are the wishbones,
who spend their time wishing somebody would do something - but that, of course,
doesn't include themselves.
Then there are the jawbones, who have plenty to say about everything, but don't
lift a finger to actually do anything.
The third group are the knucklebones; their sole purpose is to demolish anything that anybody else suggests, but have no ideas of their own. Of course,these first three groups are all close relations of the lazybones.
Lastly, thank goodness, there are the backbones, who can recognise a problem at ten paces and with no fuss, just get underneath it and do the work that's needed. What sort of a bone are you, do you think? [WS Feb 2005]
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Fair weather on St Giles Day (1st September), fair for the rest of the month!
Please let us know some others!
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I've been round and round trying to find you.
We are meant to be a pair.
I'm no use without you near me
- thought you might be tangled up with something else.
Other people are looking for you,
but everything has been sorted now and still no sign of you.
Last night we were just feet apart,
so this morning should have seen us together.
I'm in a spin and feeling totally washed out.
OK it's not the scrap heap for me yet - you may turn up unexpectedly,
but if not what good is one clean sock!
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